brightrosefox: (Default)
Magnolia plus Magnesium plus GABA: Good for sleep. Yes.

From a supplement website:

"Q: What is Magnolia Extract?
A: Magnolia Extract is a standardized herbal extract made from the bark of the Magnolia officinalis tree. It is a traditional Chinese medicine that has been used for thousands of years. Our Magnolia products are highly concentrated for magnolia's active ingredients, and contain 90% honokiol and magnolol.

Q: What does Magnolia Extract do?
A: Promotes relaxation, supports healthy adrenal function, supports emotional well-being, and aids in digestion. The bark contains two phytochemicals, honokiol which may reduce common anxiety, and magnolol which supports emotional wellness. Together they enable one to feel better mentally and emotionally.

Q: How safe is Magnolia Extract?
A: Studies show small doses of magnolol and honokiol are safe for normal emotional support. However, large doses may cause a sedative effect and interact with alcohol, increasing its effects. Therefore, driving or operating dangerous equipment should be avoided when taking larger doses of magnolia extract. Magnolia extract has a two thousand-year-old safety record for use as a Chinese medicine, and as an effective relaxant. Use it confidently and safely … but use it responsibly, according to directions.

Q: Who should use Magnolia Extract?
A: Anyone who wants a safe, natural way to relax and reduce anxiety should consider supplementing with Magnolia Extract.
Additional Information:

Magnolia Extract is a standardized herbal extract made from the bark of the Magnolia officinalis tree. It is a traditional Chinese medicine that has been used for thousands of years. Roex Magnolia Extract is highly concentrated for magnolia's active ingredients, and contains 90% honokiol and magnolol.

Magnolia Extract promotes relaxation, supports healthy adrenal function, supports emotional well-being, and aids in digestion. The bark contains two phytochemicals, honokiol which may reduce common anxiety and magnolol which supports emotional wellness. Together they enable one to feel better mentally and emotionally.

Studies show small doses of magnolol and honokiol are safe for normal emotional support. However, large doses may cause a sedative effect and interact with alcohol, increasing its effects. Therefore, driving or operating dangerous equipment should be avoided when taking larger doses of magnolia extract.

Magnolia extract has a two thousand-year-old safety record for use as a Chinese medicine, and as an effective relaxant. Use it confidently and safely … but use it responsibly, according to directions."
brightrosefox: (Default)
Sleep last night was interesting and bizarre. A lot of acquaintances - and a few friends - have claimed that insomnia must involve only being unable to fall asleep or only being unable to stay asleep. I've got a form where I can do both perfectly well, but at the price of chronic pain physically, which also transcends my dreams which really should not be allowed to happen, and neurologically, which is not only a thing but which keeps parts of me both awake and asleep. Therefore, it takes too long to reach Stage 3 NREM, and Stage 4 NREM either is cut off or doesn't happen. REM itself usually happens at a time much later in sleep. Essentially, unless I set extreme alarm clocks, I will sleep for twelve hours easily and REM will happen in those last three hours.

This time, I had slept on and off throughout the afternoon in thirty minute bursts, which probably helped me get a more normal ten hours while still being woken by pain. But this time, my dreams were deep and amazing. Since I had finally just finished reading "The Winter Long" by Seanan McGuire - now my favorite Seanan book - the concept of Faerie in a Toby Daye meets Lost Girl style story exploded, and there was even a blog announcement by Seanan that the October Daye series would become a television series. For fuck's sake, there was a character embodying both Tybalt and Dyson. And then somehow I became the protagonist, as often happens, and my husband and I struggled to release a literally faceless mermaid into the ocean before she destroyed the land. There were tentacles and it was gross. But wow, lots of powers. Many, many powers. I always get powers in dreams, usually psionic, some form of psychokinesis, normally elemental. I still recall the dreams I had as a teenager where I was pyrokinetic enough to set a tree on fire just by waving my hand at it from the window of a room.

I am especially determined to wake up after nine or ten hours to dial back whatever toll the oversleeping is taking. Then, slowly, eight hours, just to see if I can handle that "average" 7 to 8 thing that normal people talk about.
Adam somehow gets by on less than 7 per night, sometimes 4 when he's out of state working 18-hour days as an IT/AV trade show technician and manager (he loves talking about his job, and it is fascinating work, since he gets to gain secret access to some of the most powerful places in the country and listen to some extraordinary science and medical research breakthroughs during conventions; even just setting up hotel rooms full of projectors, printers, computers, and video screens means being the on site technician when powerful things happen behind closed doors. There is also fixing stupid mistakes, frozen computers, and hours and hours of human error, but more hours means more pay, and he can carry entire printers up flights of stairs).

Also, I think making myself wake up earlier than what fibromyalgia wants will keep other things stable, aside from the obvious. Since going on Zanaflex, most of my systems affected by fibromyalgia have mildly stabilized, which is amusing, since Zanaflex is just a muscle relaxer. People in various support groups kept trying to insist that it shouldn't be happening and that Zanaflex is bad for me. They are so cute when they're trying to be the arbiters of other people's realities, especially regarding brain chemistry!

I'll see my awesome husband tomorrow night, or Thursday, when he returns from another work trip up and down the Northeast.

http://science.howstuffworks.com/life/inside-the-mind/human-brain/dream6.htm
I really must try dream incubation. With everything. Dream All The Things. I've used two phone apps so far to record my sleep, and one of them quit. No, really. The other one just became boring.
brightrosefox: (Default)
You know, it is incredibly difficult to stare terror in the eye and snarl "No, you beast, I AM THE DRAGON" when you have no more hope or confidence or battle left in you.
Most chronic pain advocates describe pain and disability as the "destructive, sometimes evil dragon that must be fought." Fuck that. In this world, I am a blend of dragon and phoenix and whatever dragon they think wants to hurt me can scream it to my face; I will scream right back.
My reserves have been scraped clean. I need to rest. I have a high fever and can barely speak. And I just learned that my digital thermometer turns red and loud above 99.6. LOL. I am my own dragon. And this dragon needs to curl up on a pile of gold and copper and silver and gemstones and go the fuck to sleep before epilepsy dominates.
I am fine. I will be fine. Somehow I always turn out all right.
Until we meet again, warrior sisters and brothers.



Note: no makeup. Except lip balm and moisturizing lotion. But no fear. Not now. No time. Apologies to Body Dysmorphic Disorder.
brightrosefox: (Default)
To paraphrase a rather obscure Futurama quote:

I should be sleeping. I'm not sleeping!!

*sounds of leather whipping and Zoidberg whooping*

Some days I truly do feel like Bender. Other days I'm a blend of Amy, Fry, Zoidberg, Kif, Scruffy, Nibbler, Hedonismbot, and Al Gore's Head.

Time for deep transcendental meditation and valerian. And possibly Flexeril and Klonopin, depending. Last night's anxiety attack was really really... not good. Mild insomnia combined with major anxiety is... bad brain, no smart-making. Brain did not brain nicely at all. Brain had better brain better tomorrow.
brightrosefox: (Default)
Point 1. That extremely severe fibromyalgia flare is still raging. I am losing my ability to rage harder. My spears are almost gone.
Point 2. Now there is a mild sciatica flare. I would not wish a severe sciatica flare on anyone ever, no exception.
Point 3. I still can't sleep yet.
Point 4. Those doses of Flexeril and Soma are finally working, and I may take a Codeine Tylenol pill if needed, because now the muscles in my neck are tight.
Point 5. OH MY GODS MUSCLES, STOP SPASMING AGAIN. I HATE YOU.

*tantrum*
*spears everywhere*
*insane warrior scream*
*unbreakable diamond filament tether string of nasty curses*

Sleep will happen if I have to fucking force it. Valerian, Passionflower, and Chamomile should do it. Thank the gods everywhere that I am on disability and my main job is writing fiction.

I suppose getting enraged and violent at my chronic pain is better than crying when I know crying won't help, except when it is enraged crying. Seriously, I am about to cry angry tears of rage. Worst pain flare in fucking years. I will take as much medicine as I am allowed to make this go away, I will call my specialists and make sure they know, I will do whatever exercises and meditative things and magics I must do, I just want it to STOP. NOW.
It will never end. It can't. It is chronic. But the flare-ups end eventually. I want eventually to be now. It has been days. I can't give up, but at least I can throw my spears while lying down exhausted...

The Spear Theory
brightrosefox: (Default)
One of my favorite bedtime rituals, especially when sleep is elusive, is brushing my My Little Pony doll's hair until I feel meditative and relaxed. Lotus Star (nee "Garden Wishes") is one of my favorite toys for a reason. I have psychically charged her with so many magics and energies that just looking at her makes me feel better.

(On the wall: My father's Mayan fireplace painting created in the 1970s during Dad's major surrealist phase.)

(My makeup: Lauren Brooke Cosmetiques Creme Foundation in Warm 2, Bare Minerals Natural Lipgloss in Pomegranate and Fruit Cocktail, Physician's Formula Shimmer Strips Custom Enhancing Eyeshadow in Smoky Eyes, Rimmel Volume Accelerator Mascara in Black.)

brightrosefox: (Default)
Okay, sleep, you win. Just promise me bizarre dreams set in Salvador Dali paintings to the tune of Tangerine Dream's album "The Dream Mixes One" with glowing Tarot cards featuring shiny exploding chakra points at random times... and we're even.

Oh, my joints and muscles. You won't even listen to medicine tonight. That's okay. I'm going to sleep you down so hard you'll have trippy dreams of your own.

Hm.

Sometimes I wonder what I would have been like had I not been born with all the damage that caused cerebral palsy which led to epilepsy, fibromyalgia, sensory integration dysfunction, nerve pain, joint pain, lordosis, sciatica, OCD, ADD, depression, anxiety, migraines, spastic hypertonia, hemiparetic tremors, hypersensitivity, and mild synesthesia.
I still am not sure if brain damage and cerebral palsy is partially responsible for the wild dreams and the insatiable love and urge for writing fantastic futuristic speculative fiction that dares to go anywhere my writerbrain dares to go, which is all the way over there and way past it, where all the other dimensions are, where every dimension and little universe pulls together in the place where spacetime folds. I'll point it out after I wake up. It will be easier to find when I dream.

I don't always trip over a dream, but when I do, I prefer insane. Stay weird, my friends.
brightrosefox: (Default)
Doctor Who will actually carry the 2012 Olympic torch. Seriously. The actor who plays the Eleventh Doctor will carry the torch for a while, close to where the series is filmed. Now I'll have to watch the episode "Fear Her" again, even though that was the Tenth Doctor. Eh, enough,
http://www.bbc.co.uk/torchrelay/day8

Husband came home at four in the morning, and the cats were the picture of bliss. Nobody can say that cats can't be ecstatically joyful. Jupiter purred for hours.

My thoughts, as of late last night:

-10:00PM: I feel an inability to fall asleep coming on, and my husband won't be home until five in the morning or so. I'll probably stay up and watch the second season of My Little Pony in random order until the songs invade my dreams. Yay!

-2:00 AM: Still awake. Doing fine. Also, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie are adorable and need to be together in more episodes.

-3:00 AM: Ooh, here comes sleep. Hi, sleep!! /Pinkie Pie voice

So now, Adam and I are preparing to make brunch and such. It feels so good to have him home.
brightrosefox: (Default)
Doctor Who will actually carry the 2012 Olympic torch. Seriously. The actor who plays the Eleventh Doctor will carry the torch for a while, close to where the series is filmed. Now I'll have to watch the episode "Fear Her" again, even though that was the Tenth Doctor. Eh, enough,
http://www.bbc.co.uk/torchrelay/day8

Husband came home at four in the morning, and the cats were the picture of bliss. Nobody can say that cats can't be ecstatically joyful. Jupiter purred for hours.

My thoughts, as of late last night:

-10:00PM: I feel an inability to fall asleep coming on, and my husband won't be home until five in the morning or so. I'll probably stay up and watch the second season of My Little Pony in random order until the songs invade my dreams. Yay!

-2:00 AM: Still awake. Doing fine. Also, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie are adorable and need to be together in more episodes.

-3:00 AM: Ooh, here comes sleep. Hi, sleep!! /Pinkie Pie voice

So now, Adam and I are preparing to make brunch and such. It feels so good to have him home.
brightrosefox: (Default)
Doctor Who will actually carry the 2012 Olympic torch. Seriously. The actor who plays the Eleventh Doctor will carry the torch for a while, close to where the series is filmed. Now I'll have to watch the episode "Fear Her" again, even though that was the Tenth Doctor. Eh, enough,
http://www.bbc.co.uk/torchrelay/day8

Husband came home at four in the morning, and the cats were the picture of bliss. Nobody can say that cats can't be ecstatically joyful. Jupiter purred for hours.

My thoughts, as of late last night:

-10:00PM: I feel an inability to fall asleep coming on, and my husband won't be home until five in the morning or so. I'll probably stay up and watch the second season of My Little Pony in random order until the songs invade my dreams. Yay!

-2:00 AM: Still awake. Doing fine. Also, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie are adorable and need to be together in more episodes.

-3:00 AM: Ooh, here comes sleep. Hi, sleep!! /Pinkie Pie voice

So now, Adam and I are preparing to make brunch and such. It feels so good to have him home.
brightrosefox: (Default)
Doctor Who will actually carry the 2012 Olympic torch. Seriously. The actor who plays the Eleventh Doctor will carry the torch for a while, close to where the series is filmed. Now I'll have to watch the episode "Fear Her" again, even though that was the Tenth Doctor. Eh, enough,
http://www.bbc.co.uk/torchrelay/day8

Husband came home at four in the morning, and the cats were the picture of bliss. Nobody can say that cats can't be ecstatically joyful. Jupiter purred for hours.

My thoughts, as of late last night:

-10:00PM: I feel an inability to fall asleep coming on, and my husband won't be home until five in the morning or so. I'll probably stay up and watch the second season of My Little Pony in random order until the songs invade my dreams. Yay!

-2:00 AM: Still awake. Doing fine. Also, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie are adorable and need to be together in more episodes.

-3:00 AM: Ooh, here comes sleep. Hi, sleep!! /Pinkie Pie voice

So now, Adam and I are preparing to make brunch and such. It feels so good to have him home.
brightrosefox: (Default)
Oh, media. Oh, magazines. Oh, gossip pages. Why, oh why, oh fucking why, must you continuously pretend that there is some nutty battle between Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Aniston over Brad Pitt? It was seven years ago. Get the bloody motherfucking fuck over it. There was no affair. There was no home-wrecking. When a married couple separates and files for divorce, each party is free to date other people. They've all said over and over that Pitt never cheated with Jolie because his marriage to Aniston was already over. Co-star becomes good friend after marriage separation becomes lover after filming of movie wraps.
Personally, I always loved Angelina and was always puzzled by Jennifer, but I really can't understand why tabloids and gossip sites are still desperate to pit them against each other. (Heh, pit... Pitt...) Yes, Angelina's engagement ring is beautiful. Why are you comparing it to an engagement ring that her fiance gave his ex-wife over a freaking decade ago? Seriously? Wait, why am I even talking about this? Why is it splashed all over the news sites I visit? I don't want to care. I just want to see the pretty ring. That's all. I like shiny things. I like shiny rings with sentimental significance. I like Angelina Jolie. I like Brad Pitt. They too are shiny. Maybe that's it. Everything is shiny. *FUCKING HEADDESK*
I'm tired and I don't want to think about this anymore. Everybody just shut up and go gossip about, oh, I don't know, Charlie Sheen, he's always entertaining.

In other news, which deserves more attention:
Oh, this is monumentally stupid. I kept slipping and nearly falling during a twenty minute walk and also got progressively dizzy. This is the most ridiculous part of my disability package. I'm surprised I made it up my stairs without falling over. The soft carpeted stairs, whee! Hm. Well, now I'm on seizure watch for a few hours. I have warned the cats.
Did I sleep last night? I completely forget. I think I slept in hour-long spurts with barely any Stage 3 cycling and essentially no Stage 4. I might have hit REM state once. After the passion flower pills. Oy.
I'm having a fibromyalgia flare, a spastic cerebral palsy hypertonic flare, near-total muscle weakness of varying sorts everywhere, a headache, allergies, and a low appetite so low that all I care about is a few spoonfuls of Greek yogurt with honey. Also, while I enjoy weather in the 80s, I don't do well when it happens like surprise, heat!

I've started having dreams about my new fandom, interspersed with dreams from my old fandom. This should be psychologically fascinating. Ninja Turtles and magic Little Ponies. Huh.
brightrosefox: (Default)
Oh, media. Oh, magazines. Oh, gossip pages. Why, oh why, oh fucking why, must you continuously pretend that there is some nutty battle between Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Aniston over Brad Pitt? It was seven years ago. Get the bloody motherfucking fuck over it. There was no affair. There was no home-wrecking. When a married couple separates and files for divorce, each party is free to date other people. They've all said over and over that Pitt never cheated with Jolie because his marriage to Aniston was already over. Co-star becomes good friend after marriage separation becomes lover after filming of movie wraps.
Personally, I always loved Angelina and was always puzzled by Jennifer, but I really can't understand why tabloids and gossip sites are still desperate to pit them against each other. (Heh, pit... Pitt...) Yes, Angelina's engagement ring is beautiful. Why are you comparing it to an engagement ring that her fiance gave his ex-wife over a freaking decade ago? Seriously? Wait, why am I even talking about this? Why is it splashed all over the news sites I visit? I don't want to care. I just want to see the pretty ring. That's all. I like shiny things. I like shiny rings with sentimental significance. I like Angelina Jolie. I like Brad Pitt. They too are shiny. Maybe that's it. Everything is shiny. *FUCKING HEADDESK*
I'm tired and I don't want to think about this anymore. Everybody just shut up and go gossip about, oh, I don't know, Charlie Sheen, he's always entertaining.

In other news, which deserves more attention:
Oh, this is monumentally stupid. I kept slipping and nearly falling during a twenty minute walk and also got progressively dizzy. This is the most ridiculous part of my disability package. I'm surprised I made it up my stairs without falling over. The soft carpeted stairs, whee! Hm. Well, now I'm on seizure watch for a few hours. I have warned the cats.
Did I sleep last night? I completely forget. I think I slept in hour-long spurts with barely any Stage 3 cycling and essentially no Stage 4. I might have hit REM state once. After the passion flower pills. Oy.
I'm having a fibromyalgia flare, a spastic cerebral palsy hypertonic flare, near-total muscle weakness of varying sorts everywhere, a headache, allergies, and a low appetite so low that all I care about is a few spoonfuls of Greek yogurt with honey. Also, while I enjoy weather in the 80s, I don't do well when it happens like surprise, heat!

I've started having dreams about my new fandom, interspersed with dreams from my old fandom. This should be psychologically fascinating. Ninja Turtles and magic Little Ponies. Huh.
brightrosefox: (Default)
Oh, media. Oh, magazines. Oh, gossip pages. Why, oh why, oh fucking why, must you continuously pretend that there is some nutty battle between Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Aniston over Brad Pitt? It was seven years ago. Get the bloody motherfucking fuck over it. There was no affair. There was no home-wrecking. When a married couple separates and files for divorce, each party is free to date other people. They've all said over and over that Pitt never cheated with Jolie because his marriage to Aniston was already over. Co-star becomes good friend after marriage separation becomes lover after filming of movie wraps.
Personally, I always loved Angelina and was always puzzled by Jennifer, but I really can't understand why tabloids and gossip sites are still desperate to pit them against each other. (Heh, pit... Pitt...) Yes, Angelina's engagement ring is beautiful. Why are you comparing it to an engagement ring that her fiance gave his ex-wife over a freaking decade ago? Seriously? Wait, why am I even talking about this? Why is it splashed all over the news sites I visit? I don't want to care. I just want to see the pretty ring. That's all. I like shiny things. I like shiny rings with sentimental significance. I like Angelina Jolie. I like Brad Pitt. They too are shiny. Maybe that's it. Everything is shiny. *FUCKING HEADDESK*
I'm tired and I don't want to think about this anymore. Everybody just shut up and go gossip about, oh, I don't know, Charlie Sheen, he's always entertaining.

In other news, which deserves more attention:
Oh, this is monumentally stupid. I kept slipping and nearly falling during a twenty minute walk and also got progressively dizzy. This is the most ridiculous part of my disability package. I'm surprised I made it up my stairs without falling over. The soft carpeted stairs, whee! Hm. Well, now I'm on seizure watch for a few hours. I have warned the cats.
Did I sleep last night? I completely forget. I think I slept in hour-long spurts with barely any Stage 3 cycling and essentially no Stage 4. I might have hit REM state once. After the passion flower pills. Oy.
I'm having a fibromyalgia flare, a spastic cerebral palsy hypertonic flare, near-total muscle weakness of varying sorts everywhere, a headache, allergies, and a low appetite so low that all I care about is a few spoonfuls of Greek yogurt with honey. Also, while I enjoy weather in the 80s, I don't do well when it happens like surprise, heat!

I've started having dreams about my new fandom, interspersed with dreams from my old fandom. This should be psychologically fascinating. Ninja Turtles and magic Little Ponies. Huh.
brightrosefox: (Default)
Oh, media. Oh, magazines. Oh, gossip pages. Why, oh why, oh fucking why, must you continuously pretend that there is some nutty battle between Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Aniston over Brad Pitt? It was seven years ago. Get the bloody motherfucking fuck over it. There was no affair. There was no home-wrecking. When a married couple separates and files for divorce, each party is free to date other people. They've all said over and over that Pitt never cheated with Jolie because his marriage to Aniston was already over. Co-star becomes good friend after marriage separation becomes lover after filming of movie wraps.
Personally, I always loved Angelina and was always puzzled by Jennifer, but I really can't understand why tabloids and gossip sites are still desperate to pit them against each other. (Heh, pit... Pitt...) Yes, Angelina's engagement ring is beautiful. Why are you comparing it to an engagement ring that her fiance gave his ex-wife over a freaking decade ago? Seriously? Wait, why am I even talking about this? Why is it splashed all over the news sites I visit? I don't want to care. I just want to see the pretty ring. That's all. I like shiny things. I like shiny rings with sentimental significance. I like Angelina Jolie. I like Brad Pitt. They too are shiny. Maybe that's it. Everything is shiny. *FUCKING HEADDESK*
I'm tired and I don't want to think about this anymore. Everybody just shut up and go gossip about, oh, I don't know, Charlie Sheen, he's always entertaining.

In other news, which deserves more attention:
Oh, this is monumentally stupid. I kept slipping and nearly falling during a twenty minute walk and also got progressively dizzy. This is the most ridiculous part of my disability package. I'm surprised I made it up my stairs without falling over. The soft carpeted stairs, whee! Hm. Well, now I'm on seizure watch for a few hours. I have warned the cats.
Did I sleep last night? I completely forget. I think I slept in hour-long spurts with barely any Stage 3 cycling and essentially no Stage 4. I might have hit REM state once. After the passion flower pills. Oy.
I'm having a fibromyalgia flare, a spastic cerebral palsy hypertonic flare, near-total muscle weakness of varying sorts everywhere, a headache, allergies, and a low appetite so low that all I care about is a few spoonfuls of Greek yogurt with honey. Also, while I enjoy weather in the 80s, I don't do well when it happens like surprise, heat!

I've started having dreams about my new fandom, interspersed with dreams from my old fandom. This should be psychologically fascinating. Ninja Turtles and magic Little Ponies. Huh.

Flare Day

May. 29th, 2010 03:50 pm
brightrosefox: (Default)
I hurt like hell, but my sleep was almost magnificent.

It should not surprise me so much that I got such a lovely sleep last night. But this is the first brand new bed I've slept on since... childhood, I think. Undoubtedly the most comfortable. I wasn't completely prepared for how good it felt. I didn't toss or turn, and I didn't wake up as often as I normally would. I can't say anything about pain or soreness, but I can say that I slept better than I'd slept in years, so it is a start. I woke up without massive grogginess or wanting to scream. That's what I had wanted out of this. The pillowtop is foam and it does feel like sinking into a cloud or some such, so Adam and I believe that after a few weeks or months, it may legitimately help our back pain. The cats seem to love the bed too.

I've been experiencing standard fibro fatigue not related to poor sleep, so I am dealing with that. Adam has the weekend off, and he is on the PlayStation currently, having his own fun. I've finished Brom's "The Child Thief" and Charlaine Harris' "Dead In The Family" and am now reading Jim Butcher's "Changes." Writing my own book, not even touching editing, promise.

This has now turned into a full-fledged fibromyalgia flare. Treating it now. Ow.

Flare Day

May. 29th, 2010 03:50 pm
brightrosefox: (Default)
I hurt like hell, but my sleep was almost magnificent.

It should not surprise me so much that I got such a lovely sleep last night. But this is the first brand new bed I've slept on since... childhood, I think. Undoubtedly the most comfortable. I wasn't completely prepared for how good it felt. I didn't toss or turn, and I didn't wake up as often as I normally would. I can't say anything about pain or soreness, but I can say that I slept better than I'd slept in years, so it is a start. I woke up without massive grogginess or wanting to scream. That's what I had wanted out of this. The pillowtop is foam and it does feel like sinking into a cloud or some such, so Adam and I believe that after a few weeks or months, it may legitimately help our back pain. The cats seem to love the bed too.

I've been experiencing standard fibro fatigue not related to poor sleep, so I am dealing with that. Adam has the weekend off, and he is on the PlayStation currently, having his own fun. I've finished Brom's "The Child Thief" and Charlaine Harris' "Dead In The Family" and am now reading Jim Butcher's "Changes." Writing my own book, not even touching editing, promise.

This has now turned into a full-fledged fibromyalgia flare. Treating it now. Ow.

Flare Day

May. 29th, 2010 03:50 pm
brightrosefox: (Default)
I hurt like hell, but my sleep was almost magnificent.

It should not surprise me so much that I got such a lovely sleep last night. But this is the first brand new bed I've slept on since... childhood, I think. Undoubtedly the most comfortable. I wasn't completely prepared for how good it felt. I didn't toss or turn, and I didn't wake up as often as I normally would. I can't say anything about pain or soreness, but I can say that I slept better than I'd slept in years, so it is a start. I woke up without massive grogginess or wanting to scream. That's what I had wanted out of this. The pillowtop is foam and it does feel like sinking into a cloud or some such, so Adam and I believe that after a few weeks or months, it may legitimately help our back pain. The cats seem to love the bed too.

I've been experiencing standard fibro fatigue not related to poor sleep, so I am dealing with that. Adam has the weekend off, and he is on the PlayStation currently, having his own fun. I've finished Brom's "The Child Thief" and Charlaine Harris' "Dead In The Family" and am now reading Jim Butcher's "Changes." Writing my own book, not even touching editing, promise.

This has now turned into a full-fledged fibromyalgia flare. Treating it now. Ow.

Flare Day

May. 29th, 2010 03:50 pm
brightrosefox: (Default)
I hurt like hell, but my sleep was almost magnificent.

It should not surprise me so much that I got such a lovely sleep last night. But this is the first brand new bed I've slept on since... childhood, I think. Undoubtedly the most comfortable. I wasn't completely prepared for how good it felt. I didn't toss or turn, and I didn't wake up as often as I normally would. I can't say anything about pain or soreness, but I can say that I slept better than I'd slept in years, so it is a start. I woke up without massive grogginess or wanting to scream. That's what I had wanted out of this. The pillowtop is foam and it does feel like sinking into a cloud or some such, so Adam and I believe that after a few weeks or months, it may legitimately help our back pain. The cats seem to love the bed too.

I've been experiencing standard fibro fatigue not related to poor sleep, so I am dealing with that. Adam has the weekend off, and he is on the PlayStation currently, having his own fun. I've finished Brom's "The Child Thief" and Charlaine Harris' "Dead In The Family" and am now reading Jim Butcher's "Changes." Writing my own book, not even touching editing, promise.

This has now turned into a full-fledged fibromyalgia flare. Treating it now. Ow.
brightrosefox: (Default)
I now have confirmation that not only do I talk in my sleep and mutter incoherently, I also whimper, cry out in pain, and sob at regular intervals. Last night, I apparently also woke up four times, got up, wandered around, went to the bathroom, and openly muttered in pain.
This is one of the major hallmarks of fibromyalgia.
I've got actual proof now, though.
James and Beca slept over last night. James stayed up until about four. Our recreation room is directly across the hall from the main bedroom. James said he could hear my cries from where he was sitting, over Adam's snoring. He urged me to visit a sleep center. I agree. Honestly, he's the first non-doctor person to insist this since I was diagnosed. I trust him. I trust him implicitly, and if you know James, that says a great deal.
Agenda for the week: After digging out of this snowfall, I will locate the nearest sleep specialist who handles fibromyalgia cases. Maybe even someone who is familiar with cerebral palsy, as well.
A large part of me is yelling that I should have done this years ago. I just didn't think it was that big of a deal, you know? Nobody had observed me sleep recently anyway.

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