A very special (birth)day

Today is a very special day. Today is the day of birth of one of the most important people in the world to me: My best friend, heart-sister, and dearest love, Beca.

Happy birthday, my beloved ronin_lethe. I hope today brings you happiness, joy, love and peace.

Oh... yeah, and it's a holiday, too. Valentine's Day. Yeah, happy Valentine's Day, people. My gods, how the commercialism of this day aggravates me. No matter how happy you are with your lover, your beloved, or your spouse, it's not good enough. You need to spend money. You need to prove it, and those who don't have a lover may feel like shit. The only reason I acknowledge St. Valentine is because he is the patron saint of epileptics.
Valentine's Day means nothing but fluff and dollar signs. It is pure commercialism.
Edit: I love the message of Valentine's Day, the day to honor your lover and beloved. I just cannot stand the commercialism.

(and anyway, happy Beca Day is more important)

And my boss told me to stay home today. It's dangerous out there. The roads are made of ice. It's scary.

Adam and I snuggled up together as we both waited for the roads to clear, and half-heartedly acknowledge the Valentine's Day, but we were still snuggled up, loving each other, and lovemaking, because it's only a day. Besides, having a mother-in-law who used to own a flower shop makes one numb about receiving roses.

A very special (birth)day

Today is a very special day. Today is the day of birth of one of the most important people in the world to me: My best friend, heart-sister, and dearest love, Beca.

Happy birthday, my beloved ronin_lethe. I hope today brings you happiness, joy, love and peace.

Oh... yeah, and it's a holiday, too. Valentine's Day. Yeah, happy Valentine's Day, people. My gods, how the commercialism of this day aggravates me. No matter how happy you are with your lover, your beloved, or your spouse, it's not good enough. You need to spend money. You need to prove it, and those who don't have a lover may feel like shit. The only reason I acknowledge St. Valentine is because he is the patron saint of epileptics.
Valentine's Day means nothing but fluff and dollar signs. It is pure commercialism.
Edit: I love the message of Valentine's Day, the day to honor your lover and beloved. I just cannot stand the commercialism.

(and anyway, happy Beca Day is more important)

And my boss told me to stay home today. It's dangerous out there. The roads are made of ice. It's scary.

Adam and I snuggled up together as we both waited for the roads to clear, and half-heartedly acknowledge the Valentine's Day, but we were still snuggled up, loving each other, and lovemaking, because it's only a day. Besides, having a mother-in-law who used to own a flower shop makes one numb about receiving roses.

A very special (birth)day

Today is a very special day. Today is the day of birth of one of the most important people in the world to me: My best friend, heart-sister, and dearest love, Beca.

Happy birthday, my beloved ronin_lethe. I hope today brings you happiness, joy, love and peace.

Oh... yeah, and it's a holiday, too. Valentine's Day. Yeah, happy Valentine's Day, people. My gods, how the commercialism of this day aggravates me. No matter how happy you are with your lover, your beloved, or your spouse, it's not good enough. You need to spend money. You need to prove it, and those who don't have a lover may feel like shit. The only reason I acknowledge St. Valentine is because he is the patron saint of epileptics.
Valentine's Day means nothing but fluff and dollar signs. It is pure commercialism.
Edit: I love the message of Valentine's Day, the day to honor your lover and beloved. I just cannot stand the commercialism.

(and anyway, happy Beca Day is more important)

And my boss told me to stay home today. It's dangerous out there. The roads are made of ice. It's scary.

Adam and I snuggled up together as we both waited for the roads to clear, and half-heartedly acknowledge the Valentine's Day, but we were still snuggled up, loving each other, and lovemaking, because it's only a day. Besides, having a mother-in-law who used to own a flower shop makes one numb about receiving roses.

Love studies, hormones and biology

Todabrilla wishes us a happy Vole-entine's Day. With vole hormones.

Love studies, hormones and biology

Todabrilla wishes us a happy Vole-entine's Day. With vole hormones.

Love studies, hormones and biology

Todabrilla wishes us a happy Vole-entine's Day. With vole hormones.

Shh, the nerves are insomniac

Pain levels high again. Code red? Probably. The exclamation "Ow" does not seem to suffice right now.
I just realized it has been almost six years since I have gone a full day without some kind of intense pain.
In a recent post, shadesong talked about pain, about pain management, about life often revolving around pain management: "I acknowledge it. I tell it to get in line. I have too much to do to allow pain to be my primary partner... but ignoring it will make it worse. So. Graceful accomodation."
It fits well. We cannot always help the hurting. But we can seek to lessen and control it. That is always the goal. And different people have different ways of doing that. Prescription medication, herbal medication, alternative medicine, vitamins, physical therapy, massage, energy manipulation, biofeedback, meditation, crystals, acupuncture, acupressure, yoga, exercise. Sometimes it all works beautifully. Sometimes nothing is enough. No matter what, there is always that undercurrent underneath, reminding you that there is pain. Pain when you move this, press that, flex this, stretch that. Pain even when you are standing or sitting or lying perfectly still. Something goes wrong, screws up, goes haywire, in the central nervous system. Connections and signals are lost or disrupted or mangled or redirected. The body cries out, the body responds. Inflammation, tension, spasticity, weakness, fatigue, tremors. Parts shut down, parts scream in overdrive. When does it stop? That all depends.
You can't always keep control.
And that can be a big issue, especially if part of you prides yourself on control. If you are proud. You know you should ask for help, but sometimes you can't. Sometimes it matters, sometimes it doesn't. But you always need to accept, embrace, work with, and work through chronic pain.
I am a recovered anorexic, who has scars that still reopen sometimes. I am an epileptic whose seizures are slowly releasing control to medication. I am a person with cerebral palsy whose muscles and nerves will never be normal. I am an asthmatic who will need to keep an inhaler close by at all times. All these disorders and diseases come with various symptoms and syndromes that lead to more pain. It doesn't end.
I can't make it end. But I can help it relax. Release. Renew. Return. Refresh.
And every day, I try to remake myself.

Shh, the nerves are insomniac

Pain levels high again. Code red? Probably. The exclamation "Ow" does not seem to suffice right now.
I just realized it has been almost six years since I have gone a full day without some kind of intense pain.
In a recent post, shadesong talked about pain, about pain management, about life often revolving around pain management: "I acknowledge it. I tell it to get in line. I have too much to do to allow pain to be my primary partner... but ignoring it will make it worse. So. Graceful accomodation."
It fits well. We cannot always help the hurting. But we can seek to lessen and control it. That is always the goal. And different people have different ways of doing that. Prescription medication, herbal medication, alternative medicine, vitamins, physical therapy, massage, energy manipulation, biofeedback, meditation, crystals, acupuncture, acupressure, yoga, exercise. Sometimes it all works beautifully. Sometimes nothing is enough. No matter what, there is always that undercurrent underneath, reminding you that there is pain. Pain when you move this, press that, flex this, stretch that. Pain even when you are standing or sitting or lying perfectly still. Something goes wrong, screws up, goes haywire, in the central nervous system. Connections and signals are lost or disrupted or mangled or redirected. The body cries out, the body responds. Inflammation, tension, spasticity, weakness, fatigue, tremors. Parts shut down, parts scream in overdrive. When does it stop? That all depends.
You can't always keep control.
And that can be a big issue, especially if part of you prides yourself on control. If you are proud. You know you should ask for help, but sometimes you can't. Sometimes it matters, sometimes it doesn't. But you always need to accept, embrace, work with, and work through chronic pain.
I am a recovered anorexic, who has scars that still reopen sometimes. I am an epileptic whose seizures are slowly releasing control to medication. I am a person with cerebral palsy whose muscles and nerves will never be normal. I am an asthmatic who will need to keep an inhaler close by at all times. All these disorders and diseases come with various symptoms and syndromes that lead to more pain. It doesn't end.
I can't make it end. But I can help it relax. Release. Renew. Return. Refresh.
And every day, I try to remake myself.

Shh, the nerves are insomniac

Pain levels high again. Code red? Probably. The exclamation "Ow" does not seem to suffice right now.
I just realized it has been almost six years since I have gone a full day without some kind of intense pain.
In a recent post, shadesong talked about pain, about pain management, about life often revolving around pain management: "I acknowledge it. I tell it to get in line. I have too much to do to allow pain to be my primary partner... but ignoring it will make it worse. So. Graceful accomodation."
It fits well. We cannot always help the hurting. But we can seek to lessen and control it. That is always the goal. And different people have different ways of doing that. Prescription medication, herbal medication, alternative medicine, vitamins, physical therapy, massage, energy manipulation, biofeedback, meditation, crystals, acupuncture, acupressure, yoga, exercise. Sometimes it all works beautifully. Sometimes nothing is enough. No matter what, there is always that undercurrent underneath, reminding you that there is pain. Pain when you move this, press that, flex this, stretch that. Pain even when you are standing or sitting or lying perfectly still. Something goes wrong, screws up, goes haywire, in the central nervous system. Connections and signals are lost or disrupted or mangled or redirected. The body cries out, the body responds. Inflammation, tension, spasticity, weakness, fatigue, tremors. Parts shut down, parts scream in overdrive. When does it stop? That all depends.
You can't always keep control.
And that can be a big issue, especially if part of you prides yourself on control. If you are proud. You know you should ask for help, but sometimes you can't. Sometimes it matters, sometimes it doesn't. But you always need to accept, embrace, work with, and work through chronic pain.
I am a recovered anorexic, who has scars that still reopen sometimes. I am an epileptic whose seizures are slowly releasing control to medication. I am a person with cerebral palsy whose muscles and nerves will never be normal. I am an asthmatic who will need to keep an inhaler close by at all times. All these disorders and diseases come with various symptoms and syndromes that lead to more pain. It doesn't end.
I can't make it end. But I can help it relax. Release. Renew. Return. Refresh.
And every day, I try to remake myself.