Being Alice: Being A Ghost

Had a seizure.
Words fell off, like magnetic poetry on a refrigerator.
I remember standing at the libray, looking for the white mass market paper back of "Good Omens" and Adam found it.
And abruptly, the electric tsunami sensation washed over my body and brain, the indescribable feeling that flooded my entire spine and my head.
I said, repeatedly, "I need to sit down." I went to the couch.
It began. I panted and gasped and I saw Alicia behind my eyes. I fell into her lush Wonderland forest.
I felt my body begin to tremble and jerk and act like a creature electrocuted. It was barely two minutes. It was a roller coaster of torture and memory loss. I was barely inside myself.

Suddenly it was done. All I could do was gasp and cry.
Rick, who was over to hang out, saw me and asked what happened. I started sobbing.
Both Rick and Adam held my hands.
I cannot remember my words. I am crying.
The cats came to me and mewed and nudged me.
The cats all came to me at once. The cats always know.
The post ictal state is so crazy.
My head hurts so much. I can still feel Serena's psychic arms around me, her perfume of chocolate and coffee and fruits and flowers and amber and gentle sweet things. (http://theskinrevolution.com/_iiitawk.html Inspiration)

I am so so very tired. People surround me, and I am reassured. I will be fine. I will stop crying soon. Klonopin will help.
I feel like a ghost ripped apart. I feel like a ghost. I shine so brightly in the spirit realm.
I promised I will be all right. I promise I will be fine.
I promise.

I Am A Moonlight Witch

I don't think I want to leave my house without psychic witchcraft protection all week, because within the next few days there will be scary things everywhere, and I don't give a fuck how plastic and fake they are, I still hate them. And I will bring a pillow to press against my face and I will threaten to beat anyone with my best cane if they try to get in my face with scary costumes.

*loves Samhain, hates Halloween*
*is so close to the realm of the dead anyway that there is absolutely no need to dress up and pretend anything because the veil is close enough to touch*

I don't know if anyone wants elaboration on that.

I will say that I nearly died several times during and after birth: my three months premature birth happened at two minutes to midnight under a waxing gibbous moon and an evening star. My personal magic is more orderly than chaotic. That is, it is a gentle and static magic rather than a wild and intense magic. Both are needed, both must be braided tightly as a unit, but I can only work with one at a time, or there is pain.
http://www.kakophone.com/kakorama/EN/astrology-horoscope.php/1979/4/6

I may discuss more if there is interest.
After my post seizure post-ictal state soothes, and after I rest, and after I sleep.

Any discussion of blood, gore, zombies, decomposing corpses, hideous death, and living dead will be met with silence, side eye, eye-rolling, and growling. (Vampires are okay, as long as they appear human.)

The harvest is coming. Time to drink cider!
http://www.thewhitegoddess.co.uk/the_wheel_of_the_year/samhain.asp

I was recently given a private reserve skin cream on Etsy that the
owner, a fellow witch, picked out the name "Moonlight Witch" from my
list of possible names. It smells and feels amazing and makes me feel...
well, at home! Plus, I feel more comfortable and charged up when I do
pagan rituals under moonlight.

Moonlight Witch Gypsy Body Creme reserved for Joanna:
Cocoa Butter, Shea Butter, Olive Oil, Grapeseed Oil infused with powerful extracts of Blue Lotus Absolute, Dragon's Blood Resin, Amber Resin, Coffee Extract, Coffee Grounds, Coconut Flakes, Frankincense, Myrrh.
"She walks the path where moonlight shines, for it is there her strength she always finds."