maybe maybe me

[brightrosefox]

Sometimes when it happens it happens as a dream
and I think I know what I do, I think I remember
later I am told what happens
sometimes I remember parts and feelings but
I hear that you are not supposed to remember
so I wonder am I going crazy?
or is it just impaired memory impaired
and not loss of? altered consciousness slow like
falling down tripping floating on waves dreaming.

"Patients with complex partial seizures will have abnormal consciousness and may or may not remember any or all of the symptoms or events surrounding the seizure."
if this is true,
why do the articles say "most people do not remember having them"?
I sometimes feel like an idiot.

Comments

[saighin.livejournal.com]

if this is true,
why do the articles say "most people do not remember having them"?

*hugz* Because most doesn't mean all...it depends on the severity of the seizure and the trigger...

Don't ever feel "like an idiot" for not fully understanding every detail of the "why"s/"how"s/"wherefor"s of your illness, even the Doctors still don't understand everything about epilepsy...instead, feel intelligent and full of pride for your self-reflection upon its idiosyncrices (sp?) and your endevor to understand it more and more...

[brightrosefox.livejournal.com]

On some of the more "professional" epilepsy websites, they say that epileptics who have complex partials never remember anything at all. And that is what upsets me and makes me feel like an idiot or like a fake, because sometimes I do remember, and so who is wrong and who is right...?

*hugz*

[saighin.livejournal.com]

I'm not gonna pretend to be an expert on epilepsy, and I'm certainy no neurologist...my own few "seizure"-like episodes have all been blood-sugar/insulin related, not epileptic; I won't ever presume to call them comparable or claim that gives me any understanding of what it's like...

I can only speak from my limited experience with patients over the years, and a couple of friends whose mothers have epilepsy...but all I can tell you from my experience with them (one of whom is a nurse herself, so she has been able to be even more clinicly analytical of her diagnosis) has been that they each have varying degrees of memory & cognicense, depending on each person and the severity of their seizure...they are the only ones in their own heads during an episode, not the the doctors...so in my opinion, while the scientists may be qualified to address to address the nuerological connections of epilepsy, the patients themselves (i.e you) are the only ones able to speak to what they do or do not remember...

[ronin-lethe.livejournal.com]

also remember that there are varying degrees to "remebering". you don't know how long they are defining an actual seizure--maybe 10 seconds? half a minute? maybe you remember everything around what these people would actually constitute as "seizure activity" and you DON'T remember your complex partials.
no one can prove it either way.
and trust me, the brain is such a mystery...if they can't say what causes epilepsy, they sure as hell can't say what happens to each and every epileptic!