more of the seizure saga
Nov. 20th, 2002 02:04 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
brightrosefoxI had a long deep conversation with my mom last night, after I told her about everything. We both agree that the episodes are stress related and may be directly tied in with chemicals in my nervous system, specifically my adrenal glands. The seizures seem to hit whenever an abundance of adrenaline floods my system, for whatever reason. Mom thinks it may be due to my "martyr/angel/mommy" complex: I feel like I have to save the world, save my friends, make everyone around me happy and content at the cost of my own well-being. I've always done it. Both my parents did it. But they got over it. Mom says fuck everyone else, I come first. It's the survival of the me.
I have problems coping with stress. That leads to anxiety attacks. Add the burden of having the CP, mild as it is, the fact that my brain is damaged. Mom says that it's possible for people with CP to develop adult-onset epilepsy, or some form of seizure disorder, as their brains keep maturing and connecting. I don't know if I have a seizure disorder. It would be easier to explain if I did. But I don't know. The MRI will tell us what we need to know. I hope. The doctor still wants to recommend Lamactil (the drug whose name Beth and I were trying to remember), but it's only a recommendation. We don't know if it's epilepsy yet. Like I said, the MRI will tell.
Besides, Mom wants copies of the pictures. She's never seen my brain before.
I have problems coping with stress. That leads to anxiety attacks. Add the burden of having the CP, mild as it is, the fact that my brain is damaged. Mom says that it's possible for people with CP to develop adult-onset epilepsy, or some form of seizure disorder, as their brains keep maturing and connecting. I don't know if I have a seizure disorder. It would be easier to explain if I did. But I don't know. The MRI will tell us what we need to know. I hope. The doctor still wants to recommend Lamactil (the drug whose name Beth and I were trying to remember), but it's only a recommendation. We don't know if it's epilepsy yet. Like I said, the MRI will tell.
Besides, Mom wants copies of the pictures. She's never seen my brain before.