the Shapes of pain
Jan. 15th, 2008 10:22 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
brightrosefoxFor those who have asked how I came up with the idea to connect my pain symptoms to elemental forces:
It came from a dream. Lots of things I've done regarding my spirituality have come from dreams.
Several years ago, during meditation, I found myself in a "trial by elements" of sorts. I was forced to endure the worst all the elements had to offer, as well as aether, or spirit. When I came out of it, it was a spiritual semi-rebirth.
I hadn't thought about it until a couple of weeks ago, when I had a flare right before bedtime. I fell into a restless sleep, dreaming immediately with all four physical elements roaring through my body. I managed to push myself above and away from it, wrapping myself in a different sort of energy -- the aether, I guess. There was no pain there; of course there wouldn't be. But there was the thing I call the beast, the animal that strikes out when pain is at its peak. Subtle and silent and locked away, held only by my will.
In the dream, I wrapped the beast in chain-like tendrils of aether energy, and called up ribbons of fire, water, earth, and air, to further bind and subdue. What resulted was a web -- the pain creature could ooze out, could wreak small havoc, but it could not escape. If it did escape, if it was released, it would mean that the pain would completely overtake me, leave me helpless, leave me almost invalid. And I was too strong for that. However, I pay a price. There is an electrical current forever running through me, across every nerve and muscle and every part of me. This carries the potential to free the pain beast if I slip up. And because I called the elements for help, the elements were woven into my view of the pain, into that constant electrical current. The elements run alongside it, around it, above it, below it. The elements take on the shape of the pain. I don't control the pain, but I can control how I am ultimately affected.
I use the elements to fight the elements.
I use the cardinal points. Water to Air, Fire to Earth.
In my post on the Water-shaped flare, my husband commented that I should let the water flow through me and wash out the pain. This is an ideal thing to do. Once I get a hold of my pain, at its roots, I can try to turn it to my advantage, take the positive side of the element and put it to work against the negative side. If a raging storm threatens to crash over me with massive waves, I can become water in myself and flow through and around, let it crash and rage and then let it flow around me -- water has that power, water is forever in motion. I can dive underwater, I can swim alongside the furious current, I can let it carry me, not fight it, because eventually, it will subside.
And alternately, I can use other elements to fight. Fire. Earth. Air. And around again.
I wish I could explain it better than this. I wish I could show you exactly how it forms in my mind.
Here...
http://members.aol.com/selohaar2/elements.htm
http://www.open-sesame.com/cardinalpoints.html
If I am not explaining myself well, perhaps someone can help?
It came from a dream. Lots of things I've done regarding my spirituality have come from dreams.
Several years ago, during meditation, I found myself in a "trial by elements" of sorts. I was forced to endure the worst all the elements had to offer, as well as aether, or spirit. When I came out of it, it was a spiritual semi-rebirth.
I hadn't thought about it until a couple of weeks ago, when I had a flare right before bedtime. I fell into a restless sleep, dreaming immediately with all four physical elements roaring through my body. I managed to push myself above and away from it, wrapping myself in a different sort of energy -- the aether, I guess. There was no pain there; of course there wouldn't be. But there was the thing I call the beast, the animal that strikes out when pain is at its peak. Subtle and silent and locked away, held only by my will.
In the dream, I wrapped the beast in chain-like tendrils of aether energy, and called up ribbons of fire, water, earth, and air, to further bind and subdue. What resulted was a web -- the pain creature could ooze out, could wreak small havoc, but it could not escape. If it did escape, if it was released, it would mean that the pain would completely overtake me, leave me helpless, leave me almost invalid. And I was too strong for that. However, I pay a price. There is an electrical current forever running through me, across every nerve and muscle and every part of me. This carries the potential to free the pain beast if I slip up. And because I called the elements for help, the elements were woven into my view of the pain, into that constant electrical current. The elements run alongside it, around it, above it, below it. The elements take on the shape of the pain. I don't control the pain, but I can control how I am ultimately affected.
I use the elements to fight the elements.
I use the cardinal points. Water to Air, Fire to Earth.
In my post on the Water-shaped flare, my husband commented that I should let the water flow through me and wash out the pain. This is an ideal thing to do. Once I get a hold of my pain, at its roots, I can try to turn it to my advantage, take the positive side of the element and put it to work against the negative side. If a raging storm threatens to crash over me with massive waves, I can become water in myself and flow through and around, let it crash and rage and then let it flow around me -- water has that power, water is forever in motion. I can dive underwater, I can swim alongside the furious current, I can let it carry me, not fight it, because eventually, it will subside.
And alternately, I can use other elements to fight. Fire. Earth. Air. And around again.
I wish I could explain it better than this. I wish I could show you exactly how it forms in my mind.
Here...
http://members.aol.com/selohaar2/elements.htm
http://www.open-sesame.com/cardinalpoints.html
If I am not explaining myself well, perhaps someone can help?
